today i heard 2 kids talking about buying fake IDs after school and so i started eavesdropping cuz u know thats big kid stuff and then one was like “yeah but is all this really worth it like im pretty sure the fake IDs cost more than the fish we r gonna buy”
to buy fish at petco u have to be 18 or older
they were going to get fakes to buy fish
omfg i hate my dad’s computer he has a fucking profanity filter i feel like i’m on goddamn neopets or something
LOOK AT THIS SHIT OH MY FUCKING GOD
Please ask your dad where he got the profanity filter at. I am going to do this to everyone’s computer. PLEASE TELL ME
I couldn’t think of the word for tea so I said England water
When I was in 3rd grade, I said “damn” and the teacher heard me, so I told her I was doing a project on beavers, but I kind of freaked out that she would find out I was lying, so I actually made a diorama about a beaver dam just so no one would know I swore.
my ex is still logged into twitter on my phone
i could be cliche and tweet ‘I’m a DOUCHEEE lol’
every few days i will tweet something he would totally say
but he will never remember tweeting it
slowly the slightly out of place tweets will drive him insane
you are satan
asexual? no you misheard me, i’m 'eh?'sexual, i’m only attracted to canadians
if a girl wants to watch a sport because she thinks a player is hot then let her, it’s not like guys watch the VS fashion show because they want to buy new bras.